• Monika Bassani

Relationship "talks"

Updated: Jan 18

Relationship issues is a common denominator in marriage work, couples have many different styles of "communication". Some avoid conflicts, some argue a lot, some behave passive aggressively and some are able talk about it without raising their voice at each other, to find a compromise. Those denominators usually present in couple arguments are:

Criticism: staging the problem of the other partner's flaws.

Defensiveness: it works as the instinctive reaction to criticism.

Contempt: Talking down to the other partner and make them feel belittled.

Stonewalling or Avoiding: Shutting down any emotional response and often physically leaving the scene. Problems do arise in any relationship, they can also be avoided when both partners understand their differences, find those tools necessary to establish a communication ground where both meet each other views and needs. Therapy can help clarify those individual inner emotional needs, the body language used by the reluctant partner, who is listening and who is talking, searching for those interactions and dynamics and patterns of behavior.

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